Can Christian Bale Get Any Cooler?

In my opinion there are very few actors that can do no wrong. Maybe they have incredible decision making abilities or maybe they just have better people around them. But one of those guys is Christian Bale. I don’t think there is anybody that makes better decisions than Christian Bale. Christian Bale can be in a big blockbuster and be great in it or he can be in a small movie and be great in it. Christian Bale can be in a movie with another big star and there doesn’t seem to be any egos getting in the way and the star power isn’t completely disappointing. Just think about last year. Christian Bale teamed up with Russell Crowe in 3:10 to Yuma and it exceeded expectations. That same Russell Crowe also teamed up with Denzel Washington, who is treated like a god, and it was completely disappointing.

But there is one other quality that sets Christian Bale apart from everybody else. Christian Bale (or somebody around him) seems to know what his fans want to see him in. Let’s face it, every Christian Bale fan said “Holy (fill in your favorite expletive)” when they found out that Christian Bale would don the cape and cowl of Batman. After that it was decided that Christian Bale would be in the next Terminator movie, which everybody loved again. Next he teams up with Johnny Depp for a movie. Christian Bale and Johnny Depp? Are you frickin’ kidding me? Is this heaven? On top of that it’s a movie about John Dillinger.

Now comes the rumor that Christian Bale could be Solid Snake in the Metal Gear Solid movie. Again this is a perfect match. Video game fans (that’s what Metal Gear Solid is) are exactly the type of people that love Christian Bale. Video games fans are even more skeptical about movie adaptations than comic book fans because so far there have been no great video game movie adaptations. But video game fans would be fine with Christian Bale as Solid Snake, ecstatic even. After all, Christian Bale has done the best comic book movie adaptation, why can’t he do the same for video games?

Of course it’s not a done deal yet. While Christian Bale is the strong rumor out there other names are being tossed around by fans as possibilities. Here are some of my thoughts.
Great casting choice for Solid Snake: Josh Holloway
There are a lot of similarities between Solid Snake and another Snake, Snake Pliskin of Escape from New York. Pliskin was played by Kurt Russell and Josh Holloway is basically a younger Kurt Russell clone. He could easily play the Solid Snake part.

Good casting choice for Solid Snake: Sean Bean
I think I would prefer to see Christian Bale as Solid Snake and Sean Bean as another character, but Bean would be a pretty good Solid Snake as well.

He’s not the right casting choice for Solid Snake: Keanu Reeves
I’ve been hard on Keanu’s acting ability in the past but I don’t even think it’s about that. I think Keanu Reeves can be a decent action star if everything around him is done well but I just don’t think Keanu is the type of hero to play Solid Snake. In the Matrix Neo was cool, but he was the clean shaven, golden boy savior type. Solid Snake is the tough, five o’clock shadow, face paint wearing, gritty badass.

He talks funning casting choice for Solid Snake: Clive Owen
Clive Owen is tough and gritty and he’s a good actor. But here’s the difference between he and Christian Bale. You can never tell from Bale’s parts that he’s from the UK. Bale never has an accent. Clive Owen always has an accent. Maybe Owen has just never had a part where he needed to drop the accent so he hasn’t. Maybe he can actually do it. But until I hear it myself I’m not convinced he can do it.

Marginally acceptable casting choice for Solid Snake: Hugh Jackman
Jackman is alright, I don’t think he would suck. But I wouldn’t be waiting in line opening weekend either.

Old geezer casting choice for Solid Snake: Kurt Russell
Like I said, Solid Snake = Snake Pliskin. But Kurt Russell is too old to be Solid Snake.

Comeback casting choice for Solid Snake: Val Kilmer
Solid Snake is exactly what Val Kilmer needs to be a star again. Although last time I saw him he was getting really chubby.

If only he had hair casting choice for Solid Snake: Jason Statham
Jason Statham is the toughest and coolest sounding badass in Hollywood, and the best action hero.

Shut up Lord of the Rings fans casting choice for Solid Snake: Viggo Mortensen
Go back to the Shire you dumb Hobbits. What’s your next choice? Orlando Bloom?

I wish it would work but I doubt it would casting choice for Solid Snake: David Boreanaz
I like Bones, but surely there is something better for Boreanaz to do somewhere.

The worst idea I’ve heard so far casting choice for Solid Snake: Johnny Knoxville
Yeah, right, and what are your other great plans? Dax Shephard as Alucard? Steve-O as Master Chief? Maybe we can even dig up Dan Cortese and Bill Bellamy to be Ken and Ryu.

Lost Thoughts

Sometimes in movies and television shows it is very small details that are the best moments. One of those moments happened on Lost last night. When Locke went into the cabin to find Jacob that left Hurley and Ben there all alone. Hurley pulls out a candy bar and looks at Ben. You can see exactly what he’s thinking, “to share the candy bar with the psycho killer or not to share the candy bar with the psycho killer?” Of course Hurley is the heart of the show so not only does he share the candy bar but he gives Ben the bigger half.

So Claire is still alive, or is she? The popular theory is that Claire died in the explosion and after that she was just some creature created by the island like Christian. I don’t know if Claire is still alive and I don’t care as long as Emilie de Ravin is still on the show. She rocks way harder than the other women on the show. By the way, out of all the women on Lost, why do the American characters suck the most?

I liked this week’s episode a lot but the Lost creators have got some splainin’ to do. Let’s go over what happened.

On the boat…
- Sayid leaves on a raft
- An hour later the doctor is killed
- A few minutes later the helicopter leaves

On the island
- The corpse of the doctor arrives on shore
- Two days later the helicopter appears
- Sayid is still rafting

If they freighties killed the doctor then jumped on the helicopter and flew over to the island then why did the dead body get there two days before the helicopter? Also I can understand why the helicopter got to the island before Sayid because a helicopter is faster than a raft. But why did the dead body get to the island before Sayid? Sayid is a resourceful guy. He should be able to out row a floating corpse.